3 years ago I never dreamed I’d be marking this little milestone, at the end of the month we need to apply or not for Edwards school place. 

We have taken the decision not to apply, it’s been an easy decision. I know this is right for Edward right now, he isn’t ready to spend 80% of his day with strangers. Teachers who have no idea what he’s asking for when he tells you he wants to ‘carry you’ or that when he has a nap he likes to have his ‘belly rub’

We spend nine months carrying our children eagerly waiting their arrival, then once they arrive we spend years ‘training’ them to become detached from us, forcing our newborns from the warmth and safety into cold cots and prams, telling our toddlers not to cry and to sit still and be quiet, pushing our young children into a chair and expecting them to learn.

Edward learns by doing, by getting his hands dirty and running through the house shouting. He learns by listening to Brett and myself, by watching us live our lives and asking us what things are, taking things apart to see how they work and singing songs. Dancing and marching to the beat of his own drum.  

He likes to help me knit and push buttons on my sewing machine, he makes a good crumble mix and loves feeding our chickens. 

He’s my boy, so why should someone else get the pleasure of his company and get to enjoy watching him grow? 

From the moment you see that little line appear on that little stick, your life changes. It ceases to be just you or you and your partner. There’s another little life that you are very suddenly responsible for, are you prepared? Were you prepared? I certainly wasn’t!

With so much to think about, and the world and his wife giving me every piece of advice you can think of you can forgive me for being so confused.

In the blink of an eye, 9 months had passed and I was returning home with my squishy little boy all fresh and pink. We muddled on day to day trusting our own instincts with our parenting methods – we knew we wanted to parent alternatively, we chose to breastfeed and to cloth nappy and eventually we’ll home educate but we hadn’t considered carrying or babywearing at all until our son was about 3 months old.

We are avid carboot fans and trundled off to one on a bright Sunday morning, complete with my monstrosity of a pram. As you can imagine, I struggled pushing it around, almost ran down a dozen browsers and in my exhaustion almost gave up and headed for the safety of the car. Then, I found my saviour…….a 3 way carrier for the princely sum of £3! I swiftly put it on and strapped Edward in, the pram was folded and taken back to the car and I got to bargain hunt. Amazing.

I thought it was the bees knees, I was thrilled to be able to transport Edward around without my huge pram – it was especially brilliant on the bus. I don’t drive so I had suddenly found a new lease of life. I started to find other parents who also carried their babies and a this whole world of wraps, slings and carriers opened up to me. I fast found out that the bargain carrier I had been using wasn’t that comfortable for me or my back, so I turned to my new friends for advice.

One friend let me try her carrier, a Mei Tai. I found it so much more comfortable as it distributed Edwards weight over both my shoulders and hips rather than just my shoulders. Edward looked much happier and actually slept in it! I started researching carriers, and the science behind them and discovered the reasons why he was happier.

With any carrier, positioning is optimum. Many carriers don’t always give the best positioning for babies hips, which can make them uncomfortable and can lead to worse issues like hip dysplasia.

The best position for baby is what’s known as the M position and to get this baby needs a good wide seat, with the fabric covering knee pit to knee pit and the knee’s being higher than the bum. Like this:

Another good example is this:

Can you see how the baby is clinging on to his Daddy in the first picture? Doesn’t look too comfortable does it? So I purchased a Mei Tai, but then I wasn’t sure if I was using it correctly or not so I did some more research!

I came across a cool acronym…….T.I.C.K.S

The T.I.C.K.S. Rule for Safe Babywearing

Keep your baby close and keep your baby safe. When you’re wearing a sling or carrier, don’t forget the T.I.C.K.S.

Tight – slings and carriers should be tight enough to hug your baby close to you as this will be most comfortable for you both. Any slack/loose fabric will allow your baby to slump down in the carrier which can hinder their breathing and pull on your back.

In view at all times – you should always be able to see your baby’s face by simply glancing down. The fabric of a sling or carrier should not close around them so you have to open it to check on them. In a cradle position your baby should face upwards not be turned in towards your body.

Close enough to kiss – your baby’s head should be as close to your chin as is comfortable. By tipping your head forward you should be able to kiss your baby on the head or forehead.

Keep
the chin off the chest – a baby should never be curled so their chin is forced onto their chest as this can restrict their breathing. Ensure there is always a space of at least a finger width under your baby’s chin.

Supported straight back – in an upright carry a baby should be held comfortably close to the wearer so their back is supported in its natural position and their tummy and chest are against you. If a sling is too loose they can slump which can partially close their airway. (This can be tested by placing a hand on your baby’s back and pressing gently – they should not uncurl or move closer to you.) A baby in a cradle carry in a pouch or ring sling should be positioned carefully with their bottom in the deepest part so the sling does not fold them in half pressing their chin to their chest.

So that’s how I carry now, Edward is now 3 and a half and I still carry him and love it! It’s wonderful to feel him so close to me and hear him telling me how much he loves the cuddles. I’ll let you into a little secret. So do I.

One happy boy having a race on my new bike….well I say new, it’s a Raleigh Caprice that has been reconditioned with a nice shopping basket and a toddler seat for Edward to be safe chauffered around.
I haven’t been on a bike for near on 7 years so my first few minutes were a little shakey but Edward couldn’t contain his excitement and glee begging me to ‘Race!’ and to go faster.
So now the secrets out, I’m aiming to get fit (and if I can loose weight) I am incredibly unfit right now so I’m going to attempt a 15 minute ride each day for the next week.

I CAN DO THIS.

I can do it!!

I can count to 20

I can run. Fast.

I can sing all my favourite songs.

I can tell you what to do because I am bossy.

I can laugh so much I go red in the face.

I can cuddle my Mummy and Daddy.

I can find my favourite books and tell you what happens in them.

I can bake cakes with Mummy.

I can be very loud!

Everywhere I look today I keep hearing the Munchkin voices singing 
 
“Ding Dong! The Witch is dead. Which old Witch? The Wicked Witch!
Ding Dong! The Wicked Witch is dead.
Wake up – sleepy head, rub your eyes, get out of bed.
Wake up, the Wicked Witch is dead. She’s gone where the goblins go,
Below – below – below. Yo-ho, let’s open up and sing and ring the bells out.
Ding Dong’ the merry-oh, sing it high, sing it low.
Let them know
The Wicked Witch is dead!”

It sickens and saddens me.

A wife, mother and grandmother has died today. The first and only female PM our country has ever seen. Thatcher Thatcher, the milk snatcher. The Iron Lady.

Whatever your political view point, (those of you who say you don’t have one and then moan about the bedroom tax and the change to the benefit system please kindly go boil your heads) you can not deny the fact that the Boys Club that is the House of Lords got a short sharp shock in May 1979. A woman came to do a mans job in a mans world, and succeeded.

I didn’t agree with her policies, I still don’t. I didn’t like her, I still don’t, I lived through the 80’s and the 90’s and while I am a bit too young to remember it all, I can remember the unemployment, the strikes and riots as if it were yesterday…..surprisingly, it could have been yesterday.

Today, a family has lost someone very dear to them, yet the majority of the country are celebrating her death. I celebrated when she left office, for all of five seconds until I realised the country had been handed to John Major.

Today I celebrate women’s equality in politics and free speech. Not the death of an old lady who was once someone of significance.

I hope when I die, someone will remember to have the champagne on ice, have a boogie, get out the flags and tell my family how glad they are I’m dead. I hope they don’t spare a thought for my son’s feelings, no kindness for my family because they clearly won’t deserve it. Great Britain, I am ashamed of you.